Self-analysis and a couple of rants
Summary of the past 2 or so weeks: Think, think and think again.
A clash of ideas lead me to do extensive thinking and self-critique. It also brought back into mind issues and events that I reacted to in a similar way. This had something to do with a video campaign that was organized in reaction to the COMELEC decision disqualifying a political group on grounds of immorality and a threat to youth. (The decision was overruled by the Supreme Court pending review. The group is technically allowed to run now.)
For weeks these questions kept running in my head:
- Did I go too far?
- What am I doing wrong or am I doing enough?
- Am I too sensitive or am I just intolerant?
Maybe I chose the wrong words. Maybe they read it wrong. Maybe I was insensitive. Maybe they were too sensitive. Where were we all coming from? I am not expecting to answer them now, if at all.
I went to the extent of letting neutral parties read the transcript via email asking them to be as honest as possible in their analysis of what transpired. It was too late that I realized that the name of one poster showed. I admire one of them for staying impartial even though she knew that person. It also included someone who participated in the video campaign and she shared her views about the whole thing and how the videos were directed/produced. Even thanked me for asking her opinion.
Also after attending the national convention of the political group, I discussed this with peers to get a different dynamic compared to email. They said that it’s really hard to settle differing opinions and management approaches in a group especially if it’s made up of creative people because everyone is so passionate. They all suggested that it should be discussed since it was a misunderstanding between friends.
However there lies another problem. This particular issue aside, I feel we have reached another deadlock in the group. It has lead me to question whether it’s really worth continuing this dream advocacy with them. Do I just ignore my gut feeling but continue to be stressed about it? Do I bring it to their attention and add further to their ire? Am I projecting my ideas to the group? Am I expecting too much from them? Have we learned anything first time around?
Sometimes I think I would have been better off staying recluse. Dealing with people brings my pet peeves to the forefront.
Facebook
Myspace
LinkedIn
Youtube
Twitter
It’s never a crime to raise a dissenting opinion – that’s the joy of our supposed democracy and advocacy in general. Of course if the discussion ends up not going in favor of your side, then we just need to be able to accept that. They shouldn’t villainize you just for raising a point and if they do, then they’re incredibly shallow.
Then there’s the really ugly alternative of people not getting anywhere since people get locked in endless committee arguments or whatever and that’s the part that would affect me as well. You can either challenge yourself to find different ways of trying to convey your point and maybe get them to see reason, or you can just back away and let the more vocal folks fight it out or ultimately you leave the group since they’re no longer aligned with your principles.
Given I know the group, well, I wish you luck regardless of what course you take. You know I’m here if you need to vent or bounce off some ideas.
Thing is, I don’t even know if it’s an issue. It might just be all in my head. But not hearing from them is not exactly an encouraging sign. I may have to change my approach when/if I continue doing it.